Eric Baker makes some odd comparisons between celebs and their possible counterparts in fine art.

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by Eric J Baker

Everyone laughs at Art History students for voluntarily sabotaging their career prospects from the get-go (even the poetry kids point and sneer). And it’s almost obligatory for lame job-hunting articles on Yahoo to call out Art History as the worst possible field of study from a future-income standpoint. But none of those people thought of a little thing called “Google Image Search” that lets art historically astute bloggers put total fluff pieces together comparing celebrities to artworks, did they?*

In the words of the immortal Bruce Campbell from Evil Dead II: Who’s laughing now?

It’s not uncommon on the internets to see side-by-side images of lookalike celebrities á la those Separated at Birth books written way back before entertainment was free. But at PFC, not even the passing of centuries can stop us from hunting down yesterday’s two-dimensional doppelgangers of today’s three-dimensional stars. Look upon these images and decide: Is Baker damn clever, or does he need glasses?

Sandro Botticelli vs. Uma Thurman

We can assume that if Quentin Tarantino had been king of Florence (?) in 1485, round about when this painting was done, Uma would have been his queen, and Sandro Botticelli would have been his court painter.

Henri Matisse vs. Drew Barrymore

Actually, the Barrymore family has been in the acting business longer than Matisse family has been in the painting business. And shouldn’t Drew be about 70 by now?

Andre Derain self-portrait vs. Donald Sutherland

Now tell me, who’s the REAL body snatcher?

Peter Paul Rubens vs. Rupert from Survivor All Stars

I always thought that guy on Survivor was “Rubenesque.” Now I know why.

Diego Rivera self-portrait vs. James Earl Jones

Diego Rivera is your father, James Earl Jones. Search your feelings. You know it to be true!

The Rush Suite

Jean-Auguste Dominique Ingres vs. Geddy Lee of Rush

Posting likenesses of Geddy Lee is practically a cottage industry these days. Jean-Auguste Dominique Ingres, France’s best academic painter of the 19th century, was at the vanguard of such when he painted this portrait in 1846.

Édouard Manet vs. Neil Peart of Rush

Many, including me, consider Manet to be the father of modern art. Still others consider Neil Peart to be the father of modern air drumming. The guy on the left is one M. Tillet, as painted by Manet in 1881.

Joan Miro vs. Alex Lifeson of Rush

The fact is, Alex Lifeson is the normalest looking person in rock and roll and doesn’t seem to have a painted counterpart. He is awfully weird and funny though, like this painting by Joan Miro from 1950.

Piet Mondrian vs. General Grievous from Star Wars

I don’t know. I dig Piet Mondrian’s art, but I’ve got to say that George Lucas’ creation looks more like a General Grievous than the other thing looks like an Apple Tree in Flower, which is what Mondrian called it.

Olidon Redon vs. Godzilla (or should it be “Godzilla vs. the Cyclops”?)

Left: Olidon Redon, Cyclops c1914 (oil on cardboard) Right: Ishiro Honda, Godzilla 1954 (chemical on film stock exposed to light)

Godzilla looks pissed that the naked chick is gone. No wonder he smashed Tokyo.

Edwige Fenech vs. Edwige Fenech

There are three reasons French/Algerian/Maltese/Sicilian actress Edwige Fenech has shown up in this story comparing celebrities to artworks: She’s a celebrity, she’s a work of art, and she’s This Week’s Brunette (and a long-overdue one at that). This photo was probably taken around 1970, but Ms. Fenech is as gorgeous today as ever.

*Disclaimer: Even I was smart enough not to major in Art History.