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Karl Lagerfeld Quentin Tarantino
January 26, 2014
KILLOUGH CHRONICLES

EXCLUSIVE: Lagerfeld Pitches Script to Tarantino

I have done it! I have pulled it off! I am a hit!

How do I know? Vogue says so. WWD says so.

It’s true that Chanel, the maison de couture for which I design, is one of the few remaining big advertisers in fashion. Therefore, all the important publications are my bitches. Big deal! The fact remains that I have reinvented haute couture. How? With the sneaker.

Yes, the common sneaker used for cardio training, which as you know I don’t advocate because it makes you hungry, and being hungry makes you fat, like Adele. But if you are buying the Chanel couture sneaker you won’t be running around a bigger space than your closet. Okay, okay, maybe your bedroom, or an art gallery. If the normal Chanel prêt-a-porter sneaker starts at $600…

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By K. Lagerfeld
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December 11, 2013
TUTTLEMODE

Brits and Boobs: Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show 2013

Gentle reader,

It’s been a taxing day, what with finding the perfect Christmas tree and carting it home tied to the roof of the car while a faint grinding sound reminded me that having the brakes looked at was that very important thing I was supposed to do this morning.  We made it home, nevertheless, and Scott immediately set off to make Palm Springs a less wrinkle-y place while I stayed behind in Hollywood to transform said tree into a veritable wonder of Chinese Christmas kitsch.

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By James Tuttle
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Givenchy SS 2014
October 2, 2013
TUTTLEMODE

That’s a Wrap: Paris Fashion Week Spring 2014

Gentle reader,

Now that the U.S. Government is shutting down—and let’s hope that’s just a temporary situation—those of us who work for the national parks and many government agencies will have a little more time to think about we’re going to be wearing next spring.  For those of you who haven’t even started to think about what to wear next week, I feel you.  It’s ninety degrees in L.A. one day and seventy the next so I’m pretty much dressing according to the iPhone weather app.

Nevertheless, the marathon of fashion weeks that began in New York a month ago is nearly complete with just a couple more shows in Paris. 

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By James Tuttle
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Peter Sarsgaard The Killing
August 1, 2013
Uncategorized

ICYMI — Filming Wrong So Very Right

We were upset by The Newsroom episode two weeks ago that had a secondary plot line about Troy Davis‘s institutionalized killing by the the State of Georgia in 2011 — he was in all likelihood innocent. There are myriad problems with capital punishment, but getting it wrong is probably the worst of them.

Little did we know that we were in for a double whammy on the death penalty issue within a week. Those of us who also follow AMC’s The Killing were hoping against hope that Peter Sarsgaard’s character, Ray Seward, would get a last-minute reprieve

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By Pure Film Creative
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Lanvin Resort 2014
June 12, 2013
TUTTLEMODE

We Had to Resort to This: Cruise 2014

Gentle reader,

I’m sitting by the pool in Palm Springs where it’s 108 degrees today and thinking about what I’m going to be wearing this summer besides these four year old swim trunks.  I finally went for the shorter-but-not-too-short khaki shorts, have my eye on a couple pair of amazing cotton Brunello Cucinelli trousers and am still wondering what happened to that white nearly sheer cotton shirt that I wanted to wear to the Pride parties on Sunday.  Of course, this being June, I’m rather far behind the rest of the fashion world if I’m only thinking of what to wear for the next few months.  

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By James Tuttle
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Karl Lagerfeld
March 7, 2013
KILLOUGH CHRONICLES

Imagining Lagerfeld: Symposium in the Sex Shop

Whenever the Paris collections roll around, I’m reminded I haven’t touched base with my imaginary best friend, Karl Lagerfeld.  As some readers may recollect, he and I have had our discussions—none of which have ended well, sadly—first over a gourmet sandwich, then at rock-n-roll Ralphs in Hollywood (during which he tried to brain me with a canister of Ajax), and over a workout at Golds Gym. 

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By James Killough
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Givenchy Finale
October 3, 2012
TUTTLEMODE

Secrets Travel Fast: Paris Fashion Week Spring 2013

Gentle reader,

Okay, so I’ve hardly watched anything on TV this past week except the first episode of Revenge which was fine except that the revelation that Victoria Grayson was still alive should have been a lot more shocking than just having Emily show up at the door of Victoria’s hideout on the pretense of helping free her falsely institutionalized daughter.  I mean, really?  If ABC doesn’t step it up, I’ll be forced to do a fashion addendum to Eric’s scathing critique of 666 Park Avenue.

Madeleine Stowe in ‘Revenge’

Much of the reason for my failure to keep up with the new TV shows is that I’m being forced to watch endless training footage on this season’s accessories from my design house’s Milan office.  I’m already a bit put out with Milan in general after the mess of last week’s spring 2013 shows but this really is the last straw.  The guy from the styling office is a handsome Italian with pretty eyes and just the right amount of scruff, but watching him pick up and put down those fucking shoes for two hours is just soul crushing.  When you add the nonsensical translation that seems voiced by a BBC News anchor who has suffered a stroke and is speaking perfectly pronounced English words in a completely random order, I’m surprised I haven’t downed a bottle of Drano by now.  Let’s see if I can do better in explaining next spring’s Paris collections.

It helps that we seem to be getting some clear messages again.  Black and white are major players in most of the important collections, Japanese influences are big and the circa-1970 ruffles and full sleeves that we saw at Gucci popped up everywhere.

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By James Tuttle
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Karl Lagerfeld Sunglasses
February 20, 2012
KILLOUGH CHRONICLES

Imagining Lagerfeld

Over drinks the other night with Dame Bea and Tyler Kimball, my roommate, the psychic medium Gil Alan, was asked if I disturbed his peace at all, seeing as we both work from home.  “Not at all,” Gil replied.  “Except sometimes I can’t tell if he’s talking to me and mumbling, or just talking to himself.”  The scary truth is I am becoming more of a Hollywood schizo every day and having lengthy conversations with myself, utterly oblivious as to who might be watching me.

As long as I am displaying the outward signs of incipient mental illness, I’ve decided to embrace it.  In true American post-Oprah fashion, I refuse to be the victim and want to take charge of what’s left of my destiny by choosing my hallucinations before they choose me.  Therefore, I have decided that my inner muse, my mentor, my political advisor, that invisible large white bunny who shall stand beside me for a chat in the condiments section of Ralphs supermarket shall be none other than fashion kingpin Karl Lagerfeld.

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By James Killough
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December 14, 2011
TUTTLEMODE

Hard To Say I'm Sari

TUTTLE MODE

by James Tuttle | @TuttleMode

Gentle reader,

I turned on the TV the other day to have something in the background as I hung little Chinese lanterns on our Christmas tree, but I wasn’t really in the mood to watch football.  That probably has something to do with the fact that I fucking hate watching football.  Luckily, there was a twelve-hour marathon of this show called Untold Stories of the E.R. on TLC where we learn how emergency-room physicians become quick-thinking medical detectives, along with some astoundingly bad acting and the tedious re-caps and “coming up” parts that stretch a half-hour concept into an hour-long program.

I’d probably watch football if the Clippinger Twins were playing. (ph: Jeff Slater)

About the time I was balancing the yellow dragon’s head on the top of the tree, I heard the narrator say, “It’s Independence Day in the E.R., which means senior staff get the weekend off.”  I immediately thought, “What?  The most qualified physicians take off the one weekend when those drunk idiots out there are most likely to crash their boats or blow off their hillbilly fingers lighting illegal M-80s to celebrate the birth of America?”

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By James Tuttle
8
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October 5, 2011
TUTTLEMODE

Goddesses, Nymphs and Tramps

TUTTLE MODE

by James Tuttle

Gentle reader,

Allow me to apologize in advance.

You see, I’d already had quite a day.  For some reason, I took a hike in the Hills even though I was already dying from leg day at the gym.  Then my spray tan was accidentally set at level two.  I always use the lowest setting for completely natural looking color and never get clocked so this was potentially disastrous.

Tanning: Brazilians do it better (Photo: L.Luna)

Then, after an hour of negotiating a steamy L.A. while trying not to sweat—because, of course, perspiration is the enemy of the faux tan—my favorite bartender Kevin made me a couple of strong margaritas at St. Felix Hollywood as I navigated the dearth of images streaming in from the Paris shows.  So you’ll understand that when I finally plopped down in front of the television Sunday evening, tired and a little fuzzyheaded, VH1’s Tough Love: Miami seemed like a really good idea at the time.

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By Pure Film Creative
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