Gender Is A Pretzel

THE KILLOUGH CHRONICLES

by James Killough

It seems to have been very moving for non-LGBTs to see Chaz Bono on Dancing With The Stars.  He has even persuaded the skeptical, maybe even some of those who were initially outraged that he was going to appear on such a wholesome show, although I doubt the Christian groups which called for a boycott of the season were ever appeased.

Male model Andrej Prejic was named the 98th sexiest woman in the world by men's magazine FHM, which also called him a "thing."

For most of us in Homolandia, it wasn’t a big deal at all, of course.  We live in a magical parallel world like Harry Potter’s, full of all sorts of odd, splendid creatures walking around fucking with your reality and casting spells.  What is always more surprising is the negative reactions we still get from the religious troglodytes in the flyover states.

Mike Thompson, the acting president of our own grand arbiters of moral rectitude, GLAAD, a.k.a. The Swish Inquisition, issued this statement:

Mental Head Circus

TUTTLE MODE  | REVIEWS

by James Tuttle

Gentle reader,

At the risk of disappointing you, I’ve had to take some time off from watching television.  Work has been insane with the Private Sale going on and there have been lots of things I’ve had to attend in the evenings, as well.  For example, Scott and I went to see Kylie Minogue at the Hollywood Bowl on Friday night.  It was probably the gayest night of my life.

Kylie's Beauty Tip No. 2167: Always carry a Photoshop artist in your purse. Beauty Tip No. 2168: Never stand up. Reclining on your back takes off ten years.

I’d expected long before that it might be quite the gay affaire but, when I “checked in” on facebook, which I’m trying to do more frequently so that my stalkers can have the most up to date information, my friend Garrett in New York immediately commented, “The bars in WeHo must be empty because every queen in L.A. is there!”  He was right, and not just L.A.  It was as though the West Hollywood, New York and San Francisco Pride Festival organizers decided to cut costs and have everyone just show up at the same place, same time.  That time was now.  On the road leading up to the gates, Scott and I each said, “Oh, hi!” with that semi-surprised look that you have when you unexpectedly run into someone you know so many times I thought our faces might get stuck like that.

I Think I Cannes

TUTTLE MODE

by James Tuttle

Gentle reader,

I’m going to tell you about an HGTV show that I would love to like.  It’s called Secrets From a Stylist.  I know that I complained about HGTV’s programming a couple of weeks ago, when constant airings of House Hunters were beginning to erode my mental state.  I’ve since stopped automatically tuning to HGTV when I sit down after a long day of dressing my girls or playing my ponies but this show is already in our DVR queue.  It pops up every Saturday night like clockwork and I just watched the most recent episode.

The premise of the show is really quite good.  Perky stylist Emily Henderson analyses the style of each member of the homeowner couple with an interesting multiple choice test, designs their room for one person’s style, then layers on the other person’s style to create a perfect blend in which the inhabitants can live happily ever after.  What could go wrong?

The well-adjusted Dan Vickery adjusts himself (right).

In the beginning, I felt very close to this show.  I’d watched Emily win the Design Star competition over that very cute gay guy, Dan Vickery, whom I couldn’t watch without thinking whether or not he had a corrected cleft palate.  We need more cute, well-adjusted gays on TV to show America that we’re not always wearing leather halters or snorting cocaine on dance floors lit from below while listening to Gloria Gaynor or Cher but, in spite of all that, I actually rooted for Emily.