So You Wanna Be a Queen

THE KILLOUGH CHRONICLES

by James Killough

Now that I’ve got myself going on the subject of Tina Brown, I wouldn’t be the first to notice that her favorite circulation booster while editor-in-chief at Vanity Fair, Princess Diana, was also the inspiration for Tina’s hair bob, which she still sports.  While I don’t doubt that it is the best hairstyle to frame Tina’s face, it can still be seen as an homage that is slightly stalker-ish, in a Single White Female sort of way.

A portrait of the once future queen by Testino for Vanity Fair. She might not have been stable, but at least the kids are all right.

Last week, the comments section of Brown’s The Daily Beast was all aflutter in response to the news that girls can ascend the British throne ahead of their brothers.  Historian Robert Andrews, whose author picture looks like a byline from an Op Ed column in The Daily Telegraph from the early 60s, wrote the most delirious article that begins with how the monarchy is illogical and ends with how grateful we should be this change in the succession wasn’t in place at the turn of the last century because otherwise the psychotic fascist Kaiser Wilhelm II would have inherited the British throne via his mother, the Empress Vicky of Germany, Queen Victoria’s eldest daughter.  Thankfully, the article went no further, or Andrews might have lauded the fact women didn’t have the vote at that point, either, or World War I might have gone to the Germans, or some such drivel.

On Duchesses and Drag Queens

TUTTLE MODE

by James Tuttle

Gentle reader,

A few days ago, I stopped in at Tru Hollywood nightclub for a party for Basketball Wives’ Shaunie O’Neal and her collaboration with Chinese Laundry.  The shoes were okay, I guess.  They only cost one or two hundred so they’re not a big investment but, as you know, I’m in favor of saving up to buy something good.  More memorable than those tacky shoes was the high ratio of lighting and camera crew to actual guests and the fact that it was so damn hot in there.  Once the open bar ended at nine, I was out of there so fast I left a vapor trail.

We can't bring ourselves to lead with a picture of Shaunie O'Neal so we're starting with a picture of shirtless Jan Schumacher because, um, Shaunie and Schumacher and shirtless all begin with a "Sh."

The Basketball Wives ladies who attended were quite beautiful and seemed to have a pretty good sense of style so I decided that I’d check out their show the next chance I got.  I did and, well, it’s terrible.