Heaven Is in the Accessories: Valas Los Angeles

Gentle reader,

Have you heard about this Pinterest thing?  I’d thought it was quaintly used by fair young maidens planning their impending nuptials and “pinning” ideas to their “boards” of bridal gowns, flower arrangements and bridesmaids’ dresses that they’ll tell their closest friends they can wear again but know deep in their hearts that the dresses have to be ugly enough to make sure the bride stands out.  It turns out, though, that, if you follow the right boards, it’s pretty much like gay porn.  Without the sound, that is.  I politely “followed back”—a term I borrowed from Twitter, the other gay porn social media site in disguise—a board from a lovely lady named Jennifer Cox, whom I now suspect of not really being an anatomical lady due to her profile name, “wannabachick70.” Her bio also gives it away, just a bit:

Nicole Kidman "Australia"

Viva la Convention!

Gentle reader,

I wasn’t always very good at packing for excursions.  In England, I usually traveled the Country House circuit with black tie and white tie on top of my extensive Brideshead Revisited-worthy wardrobe but, then, we all packed heavy.  My friend Phoebe once sighed, as she shoved my cases into the boot of the car next to her shoes, “Life would be so much easier if I wasn’t Imelda Marcos in my spare time,” which was much funnier in the early 90s. 

Olsen Twins

Just One Eye

Gentle reader,

If you read this column somewhat regularly, you probably think I spend my days hiking in the Hollywood Hills or laying by the pool and my nights hopping from industry soirées to gallery openings.  Well, you’re right!  But in between all that hiking and hopping, I log many hours of hard work with clients assembling looks, diverting crises, bolstering egos and finding more and more creative ways to stay ahead in the increasingly competitive world of fashion.  Last week, for instance, I actually heard myself say,